Monday, January 17, 2005


I am sitting here at the computer, with so many thoughts on my mind, knowing that this entry is not going to be like what we’re all accustomed to reading. I’ve got the I-Pod playing in my ears, a song that is both inspirational yet sorrowful, and I’m wondering if I should really be putting this out there? There are a few bright spots to talk about, but I just feel that if I don’t get the not-so-bright-spots out, they will only fester and affect me later. Ultimately, this is MY journal and so it’s time to talk about the everyday moments in just a regular guy’s life and the ups and downs that I know we all have faced at one point or another.

This past week of work went pretty well for me. Every day was different as far as how the filming went (subject matter) and the times that we wrapped up that day's episode. I enjoyed shooting the scenes between Harley (Beth Ehlers) and Coop (me) on Wednesday the 12th; they seemed very natural and heartfelt. Beth has a way of helping you really feel the scenes with her magical character persona. I can honestly say that if I worked with her every day, no two days would be the same, and I could learn something new each day. Basically, the scenes felt good and hopefully they will turn out the same. Friday the 14th didn’t exactly turn out how I would have wanted it too. Let me first say that Lizzie (Crystal Hunt) is a very charged performer, and when she’s ready to go, she’s ready to go. She has done some amazing work, some very emotional work, and on Friday it called for some of that work yet again. We were first up in the day, but I had to film more scenes than she did, so I went straight to hair/make-up, then I had to head up, get changed and get ready for the morning’s shooting to begin.

Now usually, Crystal and I would have an opportunity to run our lines a few times so that we could hear the tempo and just make sure we had worked the kinks out of the dialogue. Unfortunately that didn’t happen, so when it came to a very climactic scene, very charged scene, we or rather I, had some hiccups that caused some serious shooting delays. Because of all the physical actions that were involved and how sporadic the dialogue was, and the lack of a "line run-through," I kept blanking on two simple lines, and so we had to re-shoot this one scene close to ten times. I’d like to say that the whole situation felt very much like quicksand. Once you screw-up, you become aware of the place in the dialogue that seems to be giving you all the trouble, and so you focus on nailing just that one place. As a result, because you’re so focused on that one spot, you begin to take for granted other spots in the scene and they become rough spots because you’re not concentrating and thinking, or rather "listening" to your partner. After all, that is what acting is all about right? We listen to our scene partner and "react" to what they tell us and hopefully make it seem very natural. Well I got so thrown that I wasn’t focusing, I was beating myself up inside, apologizing to everyone on set, and became so aware of the entire scene that every line of mine became a trap in my mind. For those of you reading this that are actors/performers as well, I’m sure that you can understand what I’m talking about. All the producers were in the booth watching this and I’m sure they were commenting as I could see the looks on everyone’s face who wore a pair of headsets. Eventually Crystal looked at me and asked, "Would you like to run the lines?"

"Um, yeah that might be a really good idea," I said.

Once we ran the lines, I was able to get back on track and we completed the scene. I was never so happy to finish one scene since I started on the show. I guess I was really scared of what the producers would say to me being as how the previous week, I was late to work for the second time due to my alarm clock malfunctioning, and now this quicksand incident. The lateness just happened to be on the same day the Executive Producer (Ellen Wheeler) was directing. This was the second time on HER day to direct, that I was late. UNBELIEVABLE! Also, there were several people in the cast who had appointments they had scheduled for later in the day that needed to be rescheduled due to our hour and a half loss of time with my scene. People were very much on edge and tempers were beginning to get very short. They told me not to worry and shake it off, but it was because I couldn’t get two lousy lines straight that the backup occurred and people got pissed. Anyway, that was my week of work going into the weekend, not a great start, I have to say.

The other issue that is really on my mind is about friends. It’s about the friends and special people who we let in and the way that we treat them both good and bad. This weekend was hard for me because I had some very special people in my life get hurt by the things I either did or said. Maybe it was more along the lines of what I didn’t do or say. If I had to pick my biggest flaw, it would have to be that I’m horrible at communicating i.e. calling "friends" back and following through with previously made plans. I think that I actually hurt three or four special people in my life in one weekend, ONE FREAKING WEEKEND. It all came down to laziness and fear of confrontation with each person because I had managed to make plans on Friday and Saturday night with each one of them. I went to dinner and bowling on Friday night with the cast when I had agreed to meet with a friend and their group for drinks downtown. When they called to find out where I was, I was already a bit intoxicated trying to forget about that morning’s bad filming episode, and so I was short on the phone and said some hurtful things that I wish I could take back. All this because they wanted to hang out with me and I went back on what and where I said I was going to be. On Saturday night, another friend of mine in Brooklyn had off work and we had agreed earlier in the week that we would get a bite to eat, some coffee and just hang out and talk. Well I didn’t do that, I went into Manhattan and never called them to tell them I changed my plans. They waited all evening for me to make a call telling them I was ready to go and it never came; some friend, right? To top it off, that same night, friends from Connecticut came in and wanted to go bar hopping and have some fun. I told them I’d call them and that we’d meet up in the city somewhere. I never called them back and as it got later, they called me and I never checked my phone until well after I had missed it. Why did I do that? Why was I so caught up in myself and lazy that I didn’t get in contact with those that I call my friends? I’ve spoken to some of them since these incidents and I was so scared of the conflict that might come that I didn’t know what to say except "sorry". What an asshole thing to do, you know? That seems like such a typical young guy thing to do. Now before you say it, yes I am a young guy but this shouldn’t have happened with friends. I could tell that I hurt them on the phone, but they were so above it. "No worries, next time we’ll hopefully get to hang out," or "You better just make it up to me/us," why couldn’t I just be above being so childish like they were? Why am I so scared of confrontation? I guess I could say that it stems from seeing/hearing my parents fight at an early age and not wanting to be like that ever or say hurtful things to those I love and care about. Granted my parents love each other, I know that, but sometimes people just know how to push each other's buttons and so a fight does happen from time to time, it’s natural.

I could go on about this, I’m sure, but I’m going to move along to some upbeat events that happened since my last entry. The "2005 Hottest Hunks of Daytime Calendar" signing event went extremely well in Virginia. People from all over came out to see Gavin Houston (Remy Boudreau) and myself, and it honestly gave me a very warm welcome feeling inside. My family also came out in full force and bought a few Calendars to send to friends and extended family too. I can’t even tell you how many individuals I met and talked to (a couple individuals wanted us to talk to their friends on their cell phones) who really appreciated not only the work we were doing, but supporting a great cause and coming to an area that rarely gets visits such as these. Whether or not it was my hometown, I would go to whatever state, county or mall to meet individuals who support us. You’re the reason why we ("Guiding Light") have been around for over sixty years ultimately. Come to think of it, maybe we should hold an online contest to see which geographic location would like us to come to their area for a "meet and greet". Let’s say the top two finishers get….us out there. Something to think about maybe; let me know what you think of that idea! Anyway, I just want to say THANK YOU to everyone who came out to support us and the Charity we were with and if you haven’t purchased a copy and want to get a copy of this calendar, just go to www.proeventsinc.comand follow the instructions.

I have to say that I’m feeling a bit better now that I’ve gotten some of this out on the table, granted there is still so much more but perhaps another time. I have started responding to some of my "blog" comments but unfortunately some posts will not allow me to respond due to the fact that they aren’t registered users. If I haven’t sent you a response yet, patience is a wonderful virtue that I’m still learning myself; I’m getting to all of them. Finally, thanks ya’ll for listening/reading these posts and again a special thanks from Gavin and I to those who made it out to see us last weekend (love you Mom, Dad, Gene, Erin and the rest of the Driscoll and Haynes clan).

Friday, January 07, 2005



Out with the old and in with the new for 2005. I hope that everyone had a safe, fun and festive holiday season. I know that I certainly did (of course I’ll be sharing a bit of it with ya’ll), but there are some really exciting things that are coming up quickly that I also want to talk about. Are you interested in what’s coming up on the show? GREAT, we’ll get to some of that as well. Oh, and for those of you that have been with my “Blog” site from the start, apparently the “favorites/getting to know you” segment that I wrote didn’t go unnoticed by the Soap Magazines. Lets get started!

Every year we always tell ourselves “alright don’t go overboard on the holiday shopping this year”…yeah, well that didn’t go so well AGAIN for me. It seems that even though I made a list of things that I wanted to get for family and friends, I always seemed to find something else that I thought they might like or need. Whether it was electronics for the guys on my list, toys for my niece and nephew, or clothes, fragrances and jewelry for the females, after a while it all just seemed to mesh together. After realizing that I was hauling something like fifteen bags around, I thought, “this has to be enough”. Then the fun part really begins….wrapping everything. This area is usually a hit or miss with me and I say that because it really is true. The presents either look like they should be sitting in a Macy’s window OR something a third grader wrapped with four hundred pieces of tape basically laminating the whole damn thing! Needless to say I managed to get everything wrapped on time for Christmas morning. I have to say that my little nephew on Christmas morning had no clue what to think when he saw all these great big shiny boxes. He helped everyone unwrap their gifts and ended up wearing all the bows on his head and shirt and looked like a giant bow with two little eyes by the end of the day, it was pretty cute. As far as gifts for myself, it was pretty much to the point. I received some great workout equipment that I can take back up to New York, a few historical documentary (WWII) dvd’s, some clothes and lastly, some home essentials for my apartment. Yes, that is still a work in progress and will continue to be so for a while longer.

New Years was kind of an up in the air event this year for me. I was sick again between Christmas and New Year’s, so I ended up staying in Virginia for all two weeks and just relaxed. New Year’s Eve, I spent with my sister and brother-in-law and a few bottles of wine and a bottle of champagne at midnight…yum. My brother-in-law is a gourmet chef so needless to say; we had a great meal that night and I was in bed shortly after the ball drop. When I saw how many people were in Time Square, I was pretty happy with the choice I made. I just wasn’t in the mood to get shoved all around and fight for space that night. Yes, I was a bit lame, fine I’ll give ya’ll that one but it was still a great way to start 2005 off.

Moving on to the show now, how many of ya’ll like our holiday episodes? They were so much fun to shoot especially with Frank Dicopolous (Frank). He is such a character in person as opposed to Frank “the police chief” on the show. That whole kazoo bit on the New Years episode had to be shot like three or four times because we never were doing the same song or Frank would say/do something that would make Beth (Ehlers; Harley) laugh and then the chain “laughaction” (worse than just a chain reaction) would happen. I had a few problems concerning my trench coat and the bottle of champagne in my pocket….yeah, I know! When I went to take it out the first time, I think I said something like “look what I’ve got here; Surprise!” and was fumbling inside my coat at waist level to pull the bottle out. Well, on the monitors in the control booth it looked like a different story and that dialogue didn’t help. That got a few laughs on set too. Anyways, on to the present tense and the issue of Coop and Lizzie and their growing romance or game with one another. Our announcement of going on a date has just recently aired but I’m sure how our date goes will be a bit of a shocker. I’ve been reading all the comments from not just the Blog site (thank you for all of them), but on the CBS/Guiding Light/Letter Rip column. People seem to be pretty torn evenly about seeing and not seeing this coupling happen. All I can say is keep the comments coming because they really are taken into consideration when plotting each character’s story. I still believe my main function on the show is to be tormented by that little dog of hers, LOL!

As far as some upcoming events or articles to watch out for, I have some information to give you. For all of you avid watchers of our show who more specifically live in the Baltimore, Washington D.C., Virginia area, both Gavin Houston (Remy Boudreau) and myself, will be appearing at the Dulles Expo Center this Sunday (January 9th) from 1pm to 3 pm to help raise money in support of the “Florida Hurricane Relief Fund”. We will not only be signing autographs but the brand new “Hottest Hunks of Daytime 2005” calendar will be on hand too. I would love to see as many of you all out there to say hello to and take some fun crazy pictures with, it’s the nerd in me coming out! The exact address of the location so that you all can google it is: 4368 Chantilly Center, Chantilly, Va. 20153 and we will be located in the “North Building” of the Expo Center.

Let me just say that ANYONE CAN COME to this event but I just figured that it would be more convenient for those individuals that live in the areas I mentioned. The other really cool part is that you can make a day of this because there will be an arts and crafts event going on at the same time and this place is HUGE! Tickets to get into the building will be $7 and the calendars are $10 from what I’ve been told, with proceeds going to the charity fund, but we are absolutely FREE to hang out with! The other really exciting thing for me is that I received a call the other day about an interview with “Soap Opera Weekly” and they wanted to feature me as the back full page of the “getting to know you” segment. This segment is just a huge list of quick questions that are fun and informative. When I found this out, I had to laugh since I didn’t think this would happen for quite a while so I did it myself on this Blog site. The people for “Weekly” apparently read it and wanted to dive deeper with the questions, so BE ON THE LOOK OUT at your nearest convenience store for the article and I will also let you know if I see it.

Before I complete this novel I’ve been writing, I wanted to thank all of you for not only the comments on this site but those of you who have also written letters to me addressed to the studio in NY or e-mails on the GL website. If you have asked for a signed picture/headshot, I am actually in the middle of getting some specifically made for sending out to you, but it will take a bit of time. Please bear with me and I’ll send them ASAP. This is all still very new and I wasn’t prepared for sending my pictures out, LOL!

Now, I have to laugh at all the comments I’ve been receiving on this site because some are really great and some are really funny. Regardless, I love them all and hope ya’ll keep asking them. The music choices you’ve asked about, my age (not sure I want to give that away yet but feel free to guess), whether or not I have a girlfriend, what it feels like to be an uncle, how I got started into acting, what it was like moving to the city, etc???? I’ve tried to answer each comment but for some reason I can’t seem to access sending a response but I WILL FIGURE IT OUT….it just might take a bit first ;P

I look forward to seeing those of you who can make it out this weekend, as well as hearing from you on the comments board here. All the best to you and yours in 2005 and let me know what’s happening in your life too. Who knows, you may have more in common with me than you think! Oh and before I forget, enjoy the twists and turns the upcoming Lizzie and Coop saga take ;p